Fluffy Mackerel Pudding

In the early 1970s, Weight Watchers and other companies created packs of recipe cards that they gave away with hideous giant plastic recipe boxes in order to try to hook gullible Americans (and perhaps Canadians, though I hope they had the good sense not to follow their U.S. cousins) into subscribing to a series of monthly recipe packs which arrived with billing statements and hefty postage fees. The special introductory offers provided a free recipe box and the first set of recipe cards in the hopes that the person ordering them (a.k.a. the sucker) would then get (and pay for) a new set of recipe cards every month. After a year or so, the sucker would have a whole collection of supposedly mouth-watering original recipes that would allow a hungry family to eat hearty, wholesome meals that would satisfy all their nutritional needs and cravings for just pennies a serving. Once the vast majority of Americans realized they could get a free plastic recipe card box and 24 or so cards featuring scary color photographs of unappetizing food and then cancel their "memberships" in the recipe clubs, they were all stuck with giant awkwardly sized recipe boxes into which nobody could fit any of the recipes they might actually want to keep. I know this because I ordered my own giant plastic free recipe box when I was about 11, and I kept it for years figuring I would someday figure out how to store actual recipes in it, to no avail.

A few years ago, I somehow stumbled onto a brilliant Web site with fabulously unappetitizing (and splendidly captioned) examples of Weight Watchers recipe cards from 1974, and every few months I go back to the site to laugh until I snort and my sides ache. Whenever I do, I always start my pilgrimage to Tacky Town with my personal favorite recipe: "Fluffy Mackerel Pudding," the highlight of the "Convenience Fish" section. The name speaks volumes. But I'm always delighted when I make my way through the pack and get to other mouth-watering delights such as "Hot Wrap Ups," which include the delicious hot lettuce, pickle, chive, caper and celery combo, as well as "Rosy Perfection Salad," an exciting little number featuring shredded red cabbage in molded purple gelatin. Who could say no to a brandy snifter full of "Jellied Tomato Refresher," or a man-pleasin' pan full of "Mackerelly"? The "Fish 'Tacos'" which are completely free of tortillas look especially authentic and enticing, with their shredded green cabbage, tomato chunks and some sort of chopped fish on a bed of . . . toast. And in the "Budget Best Bets" category, don't forget "Frankfurter Spectacular," a sexy little dish of hot dog halves wrapped around a pineapple core and garnished with carrot, potato and pineapple chunks. Between meals, why not fix yourself a plate of "Polynesian Snack," featuring the excitement you can only find in a dish composed of canned bean sprouts, buttermilk, pimiento and fruit pieces. That's snackin' satisfaction! For a peek at "Snappy Mackerel Casserole" or the famous tortilla-free "Marcy's 'Enchilada,'" you must check out the Candyboots Web site. The wicked captions make enjoying these recipe cards a pants-wettingly entertaining experience.